Separated At Birth -- Fictional Character Edition
Things I'd Like to Share With You, If I Only Had the Time

Proposed for Inclusion in DSM-V

Aaron Haspel provides practical time-saving advice on "What Not to Read". Among his suggestions: Avoid the blogs of women who write about their children.

Mother bloggers inevitably start writing about how the school bully is picking on little Eustace or how little Tiffany has been punished for posting nastiness in someone else's comments section and it was really her who wrote it, not me, no matter what you think, and how dare you call social services on me, and you must be deranged to imagine that I would do something like that. Follow the links if you must. The point is, you need not.
[The proprietor of this blog has omitted the links from the preceding excerpt, lest you should be tempted to follow them from here. The link in the following paragraph has been preserved, however, as it bears on the subject of this post. Mr. Haspel continues:]
The biggest spread on Wall Street is reputed to be between your current job and your next one. The biggest spread in the universe, mothers, is between your own and everyone else's interest in the doings of your precious darling. As for the Father of all Mother Bloggers, am I the only one who skips the Gnat parts?"
No, sir, you are not. I, too, have taken regularly to skipping those portions, although I confess Mr. Lileks' establishment remains a daily stop on my reading rounds.

May I propose we define a new syndrome, akin to Blogorrhea (alternative definition here) or Hitnosis? Perhaps it can be called Hyper-Expressive Familial Fondness Syndrome (Internet variant) or, for brevity's sake, Lilexia.


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